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Hypnosis Training Podcast by Cal Banyan #43: Cal Banyan’s Hypnosis, Etc. with Celeste Hackett - Introduction, Question About “Overcoming embarrassment when faced with sexual problems from clients.”

Hello Everybody,

Cal Banyan here once again with Cal Banyan’s Hypnosis Etc., with Celeste Hackett, I’m here in Tustin, California and she’s way out there in Texas somewhere.  Celeste what’s going on today, you’re in charge?

Celeste:  Oh wow, well that’s really cool I like being in charge.  You’d better look out Cal because I’ve got some good questions for you and I’m just ringing my hands, just ringing my, rubbing my hands together, the ringing my hands mean I’m, I’m scarred.  I’m rubbing my hands together because I’m so gleeful about this, ok.

Cal:  Do you have like a little pointed witch hat on and stuff like that?

Celeste:   Something like that yeah, yeah just like that, ok the first question to right out of the box I love this one because it’s a really interesting one.

Cal:  Wait, wait, wait, Celeste before you get started how many questions you got for me today?

Celeste:  I’ve got 3 questions, one of is about a Hypnotist who ah is really ah scared to work  this guy who has Mel dysfunction maybe scared isn’t the word but he’s really uncomfortable about it, he’s never worked with that issue before.  And ah another one umm is about Age Regression, and bringing up a feeling is another one like that and umm actually the others are a secret.

Cal:  Ok, I just wanted to get kind of an overview so I could get into the groove for  let my subconscious mind start preparing itself for these questions,  good, good ok fire away Celeste.

Celeste:    Ok, umm so the question that I got from a Hypnotist that I thought was really interesting this week, and this, this really ah is something that every Hypnotist deals with sooner or later you, you know until you see a lot of clients you’re going to be umm faced with problems that maybe you’ve only heard whispered about or read in magazines about or maybe seen on T.V., and umm this client says Cal I’m a new Hypnotist faced with a situation that is making me very uncomfortable.

I recently booked a male client for erectile dysfunction I’ve never worked with anything like this before and my initial enthusiasm is rapidly becoming deflated.  I think this guy has a sense of humor Cal, and I’m faced with the first upcoming session.  Ah this topic is personally very embarrassing to me I don’t think I can actually even say the clinical words to deal with the clients lack of gusto. 

And ah, I’ll always be professional I’m going to handle this in a professional way there’s no question about not dealing with this problem,  but how do people overcome this when they’re starting out as Hypnotist?

Cal:  Well, what, what, what’s your impression about this Hypnotist, is it umm, is, is, this Hypnotist nervous because just the, the, the subject matter or is it because of lack of training or what?

Celeste:  Well the impression that I got was that he just never has talked to anybody about anything like this and especially man to man.  Maybe, hey, maybe he’s even got the problem, no that’s going a bit too far isn’t?  So, yeah I think he actually just is ah, to me it sounds like he’s just really not ever talked to anybody about this even maybe used the words.

Cal:  Ok, so I’m getting the jest here is that, that you know maybe just there’s a lot of Hypnotist out there that are just kind of nervous about talking about sexual stuff and it could be a, a penis, or it could be a vagina or anything like that and, and sometimes what I have to do is you know in class with people, I, with our students I sometimes have to say ok repeat after me, penis, good vagina you know and then get. 

Let’s start using grown up words about grown up parts of the body and, and then you can start working with grown up issues and ah you know if you can’t I mean if you’re not ready for this then sometimes you just have say gosh I’m not ready for this ah, but, but really it’s you just get in there and you start talking matter of factly like you’re in Biology class and you find out get a thumbnail sketch of the problem and, and find out what the benefits for this individual would be and umm then you just get started.

And umm there are some good erectile dysfunction ah scripts out there, I got one in my script book and you just get started.  Ah, but most of this isn’t going to be accomplished in umm dealing with just direct suggestion alone it’s a great place to get started but then you want to get into ah really going after the cause of the problem which is going to involve ah, ah, ah, really an emotional nature and, and it’s usually some kind of anxiety, nervousness, worry that kind of thing that gets in the way. 

And by the way if you’re going to be working with ah erectile dysfunction or EED as they’re calling it on the commercials now a day now a days umm you want to get them checked out by a doctor first because if there is some kind of nerve damage you know that kind of thing then all the Hypnosis in the world is probably not, not going to help them out.  So you are going to send them out for a referral the doctor is going to check and make sure everything is working right and then, then it’s time for some Hypnosis, does that help out ah Celeste?

Celeste:  Yeah I think that helps out a lot.  Now you know when you were talking about ah say it in the classroom, repeat after me penis, vagina I don’t think it’s a bad idea to walk around your apartment or your house and say those words out loud and start using in conversations with people that you are can use them with.  Maybe talk with some other people or just record it until you just get real comfortable with the words, because ah in situations like this you are going, you’re going  to have to be able to use these words. 

Cal:  That’s right and you know let’s admit it, if there are any men out there watching this I don’t like the word penis you know, I, I wished they would have called it something else, but, ah, umm you know I don’t want to wax too humorous here but you know the magic wand or something like that.  But ah penis just sounds like you’re ah I don’t know 7 years old going on 8 years old. 

But that’s the word that’s what we’ve got to use that’s what we’ve got to get used get comfortable using and that kind of thing.  How do you feel about the word vagina?    

Celeste:  Umm kind of the same way you feel about the word penis.

Cal:  Yeah, I, do have ah, a, a preferred word that you could say on, in a Podcast?

Celeste:  Umm probably not with a client.

Cal:  So we’re kind of stuck saying what we got a say and so you just got to get used to saying it that’s all there is to it.

Celeste:  Yeah, I mean in, in younger days it would have been down there.  And then of course you know there, there are various parts to the part.   

Cal:  Ok, now we’re getting…………………

Celeste:  Yeah now we’re getting a little to in depth here.

Cal:  That’s right we’re going to have to label it an adult site if we go any farther.

Celeste:  Yeah they might, they might kick us off of ah the internet or something.

Cal:  Let me just say that umm just don’t work beyond your training but really this ah erectile dysfunction it’s got emotional cause.  If you’ve been training in working with emotional issues there, there’s really not that much difference.  Ah just move ahead, umm you want to be able to find out what their benefits are umm for ah being able to overcome any particular problem. 

Mix those benefits in with ah the script that you’re going to be using and it helps them relate the script that you’re using and then ah move on to the more powerful  techniques, you know you got to get in there to the Age Regression and the Forgiveness therapy.  Because in the mind of the client someone did that to them that person is going to need to be forgiven and then also ah heck as they go through the process even more they’re going to find out that ah that you know they had some responsibility for the problem. 

So you want to go into ah the, the forgiveness of self and ah sometimes there’s even some secondary gain issue so you want to do some parts mediation therapy.  Ah it’s amazing how sometimes between couples there can be power plays by umm you know, either withholding sex, and stuff like that, that, that your client might not be consciously aware of so ah they might have to forgive their mate or you know that kind of thing.  Ok, unless you have anything to add to it Celeste I’m ready to move on to the next question. 

Celeste:  I think we should move on, yeah. 

Cal:  Before you move on I want to say some stuff, I want to say Hey it was a great time at the NGH Convention and it was really cool because www.ourhypnospace.com  members were actually walking up too people and saying I know you from www.ourhypnospace.com.  So it was, it was a really cool way for people to ah actually know each other and do some really great networking before umm they got to the convention and so it was really cool.

  And umm, oh and Celeste I want you to promise me that unless there’s a huge something unforeseeable that you’re going to go to the convention next year. 

Celeste:   Alright, I’ll put it in my goals you know my, you know I started a goals group on www.ourhypnospace.com.

Cal:  Yes I saw that.

Celeste:  Yes I’m going to put that in my goal on my list of goals and next August I promise I’m, you know I’m putting this down for the world to hear I will be there.

Cal:  You know it’s going to be more important than ever you’re going to love it.  Because ah you know lot of people are going to know you from the stuff you do with me like these Podcasts and stuff.  And you’re just going to go there and find out you have umm you know two, three thousands of best friends.

Celeste:  You know I already have a umm had a lot of people writing me asking me, they ask me last year and this year, am I going, am I going, and it’s makes you feel pretty bad to say no umm but you know I, I, I, just had a lot of clients this year and we’re sort of on an austerity program trying to pay off a couple of bills and so my husband said just please wait until next year and I said ok I’ll wait one more year and that’s it.

Cal:  That’s it, good well I’m going to put in one more thing here umm let’s see one of our Hypnotherapist here at the center Mark ah, I’m going to hold this up so he, he brought me this ah, this is just a photo copy of it, but evidently there’s a Jewish community magazine and you can’t see this Celeste but, I’m holding up the cover of that.  And umm in, in that magazine the, there’s a really nice article where they go over what Hypnosis is about and, and the article’s called Hypnosis Demystified. 

And ah in our next episode I’m going to talk about another major magazine where one of my friends who’s, a Hypnotist got an article in there too.  And I’ll give you a hint don’t say anything, don’t guess Celeste the magazine starts with “O” and its not outdoor magazine.

Celeste:  You’re kidding me.

Cal:  No, no, no, ok give me another question let’s get going.

Celeste:  Ok, this by someone interested in getting into the Hypnosis profession is a, a simpler question in a lot of ways, thank goodness.  Umm it’s just a question ah by someone interested in getting into the Hypnosis profession.  And they say they just have a regular voice that’s kind of soft and she says ah will I be, will my voice be, good enough to hypnotize someone and if not what kind of vocal practice do I need to do to become a Hypnotist and make my voice better?

Cal:  Well really you know if you don’t have one of those, FM jock, you know kind of low, Barry White type voices you, you, you’re pretty much out of luck in the Hypnosis profession.  What do you think of that Celeste?

Celeste:  I think that’s a lie.

Cal:  Well, why is that a lie Celeste?

Celeste:  Well because umm you know just a nice voice, a mid ranged voice is good, deep voice is good.  People tend to listen to the directions they’re not really interested how beautiful your voice is and once you’ve Hypnotized them and you’ve gotten them into the, the state that they need to go into and they’ve had that first enjoyable session it’s doesn’t matter how bad your voice is suddenly they seem to think you have the most beautiful voice in the world.   Isn’t that right Cal?

Cal:  You’re absolutely right you know I wrote an article on this.  And it was in the ah, I wrote a regular column in the ah National Guild of Hypnotist, Journal of Hypnotism and it was you know talking about your perfect and developing the perfect Hypnosis voice and really I’m one of those guys that I mean.  I remember the first time I heard myself in a recording I was just a kid, and I, I hated it I was shocked you know.  

People don’t realize that the way we sound to ourselves is different than how we sound to the world.  And umm so I was really, didn’t like my voice, I’ve never like my voice and then I got into this business and I realized that people were always saying man you’ve got just the right voice for this and I’m thinking wow that’s great. 

And then really I began to understand that the, the proper voice for Hypnosis is the voice that is you know easy to understand they shouldn’t, you shouldn’t ah you know run your words all together where they can’t understand you.  But otherwise what happens is when you talk to the person during the Hypnosis pre-talk and the pre-Hypnosis interview ah they get to know your voice and then when you do the Hypnosis session the most important thing is congruence. 

And ah what do I mean by that I mean that the tone of your voice should be congruent umm with, with what you’re saying in other words if you’re deepening them into what you’re suggesting relaxation then you’d want to use a relaxed tone of voice.   If you’re doing something where you’re talking to them and they’re regressed as a child then you want to use very simple terms and you talk to them like this, let’s say they were 7, well hi 7, how’s it going, what’s happening, hmm,  what are you thinking 7?

And so you, you kind of lighten up your voice like you were talking to a child and that kind of thing.  If umm you’re trying to get them to bring up emotion then you want your voice to become very dynamic you know, ah for example if I’m trying to bring the emotion up to, getting ready to do an affect bridge, Age Regression technique, I’ll say something like this in a moment I’m going to count from 1 to 5 and when that feeling and when I get to 5 that feeling is going to come up as strong and powerful as it’s ever been.

1, that feeling is coming up strong and powerful 2, coming up more and more 3, strong and powerful with you, and so if you’re listening carefully to the sound of my voice it’s very dynamic and I’m increasing the excitement and the amplitude of my voice as I’ am suggesting that their emotions come up.  Is, do you think that, that’s what their wondering about Celeste?

Celeste:  Yeah, and umm I also think that a lot of people have the wrong idea even about doing the induction you know a relaxed voice isn’t necessarily a slow voice or a very deep voice or a very overly feminine or sexy voice.  You know you just want to have a natural sounding voice and you want to take ah, ah breaths and, and put a little space in between your sentences to give them time to ah follow your directions.

Even if it just means taking a breath or settling in a little bit down into the chair relaxing.  You know you don’t want to just go one sentence right after the next, the next without any pausing and you don’t want to stretch out your words either, because that’s just sounds silly, and that’s going to tend to make them laugh and leave, you know.  You just want to say ok now close your eyes and take a deep breath in and hold it for a few seconds, now let it out and go deeper.

Something like that, that’s not usually the way I do my, my induction.  I do an instant induction and then deepen about like that, and then a lot of it is just giving them space to, to, deepen themselves.  You’re giving them the instructions give them time to make it happen. 

Cal:  Beautiful, yeah and the, you know I actually speak quite quickly when I’m doing an induction.  For example ah here’s part of the, the Elem Banyan induction and I just go ah take a look at my hand, take a nice deep breath, exhale close your eyes you know you can relax your eyelids so much that they just won’t work.  Once you’re sure you have done that hold on to that relaxation and then check them to make sure they won’t work. 

And, and so it’s, very, just an instructional voice ah unless I’m starting to really deepen them then, then I will go slower and softer and that kind of thing.

Celeste:  Right I mean you don’t want to start screaming at them if you want them to relax like close your eyes and relax right this instant, I mean that wouldn’t make any sense either.  But you don’t want to, to bore them to death, death or be so slow in your tonality and in your delivery that they just fall asleep unless you’re doing an insomnia CD which in that case might be a really good thing to do, huh, Cal? 

Cal:  Yeah, I got a, a, a recording for, it’s called free to sleep ah, Hypnosis on CD and all I do is kind of talk slow and soft and do ah, ah, progressive relaxation and then every deepening technique I can think of for about 20 minutes and everyone tells me boy that, that puts them right to sleep, so.  Ah, hey Celeste I, I get the feeling you’re kind of wound up today are you kind of wound up?

Celeste:  Yeah I’ve had a ton of coffee today I don’t know why, but it just tasted so good and I drank almost a whole pot.  And yeah I’m just really bouncy and probably a wee bit annoying so sorry.

Cal:  Good, good, good.  Hey let me make a couple more announcements here are we done with that topic? 

Celeste:  Yes, let’s move on.

Cal:  Ok, hey I want to say just a couple more things.  I, as a in a previous Podcast I think I announced that I have www.hypnosis.org  and what I want to get from our viewers and our listeners is any suggestions you have about what the most ideal Hypnosis resource website would be.  And umm, one of the things we’re going to do is we’re going to have some Hypnosis scripts on there, we’re going to point to news on there, we’re going to maybe point to some of the best blogs on there and we’re going to point to ah real scientific research that comes out and some of the most important organizations, and I just got a message ah from you in the mail yesterday or today about something that should be on there too, what was that Celeste?

Celeste:  Well I really think what would be a great idea, if for, its www.hypnosis.org right?

Cal:  Right.

Celeste:  Is umm, a Hypnotist who’s who because if you’ve ever talked to a Hypnotist either in email, or maybe you, you even ended up talking on the phone for a little while and then time goes by and you talk to another Hypnotist and you want to get back to one of the earlier Hypnotist you talked to but you can’t remember where they are or what they specialized in and so on, it’s kind of a bummer. 

You need to be able to, we need a place where we can put our information and not just umm contact information but also just the things that we’re into and what we are doing.  For instance Tina Schaeffer in Adrian, Michigan is one of the best small town Hypnotists that I’ve heard of in a town of $20,000.00 she’s making money, and umm. 

Cal:  $20,000.00 dollars

Celeste:  I mean sorry, in a town of 20,000 people, 20,000 people and she, did, about an hour away on, in several directions there are larger cities, but she’s not pulling from them yet, she’s jut pulling from that immediate area, and she’s pretty amazing and so umm, I like, I just want to kind of keep her in my back pocket as somebody that I can refer another small town Hypnotist too when they call me and ask me how do I make money in my small town?  And so I just think a Hypnotist who’s who would be a great idea. 

Cal:  I think that is a great idea.  One of the things we were thinking about doing was 2 things, 1, is we’re going to do ah, ah, ah who’s who in Hypnosis and it’s going to be the notables ah that, that people hear about and stuff like that. Umm we’re going to have you know, short, Biographical information, and some contact information and then if I can work out the details what we’re going to do is we’re going to put a directory on there too ah, of people umm you know that, that, that Hypnotist can get on and just, and just to help get the word out.  So ah we just got a whole bunch of stuff and I want to hear about other suggestions, we’re in that planning it phase. 

Celeste:  You know Cal I had another idea I think this one would take a lot of money and a lot of effort though so I don’t know if it is even possible.  But umm some sort of conference room where people could get on there for audio, or audio, video meetings that are you know regular interval meetings, maybe paying a small fee or something because people like the, the different groups on www.ourhypnospace.com for writing but I wonder if a lot of Hypnotist would also love to just meet face to face kind of like we do at the 5-Path study group, that I do, it’s pretty cool. 

Cal:  I, I, I know we could do that, it’s just a matter of trying to umm figure out how to do that and maintain some kind of ah quality assurance because we don’t want to get someone in there using it in an inappropriate way.  Someone would have to kind of moderate it live, and so if we could get some moderators ah who’d go in there when, when they’re open, like for example, Friday night chat or something where people just go in there and just visit. 

And we’re also ah working on getting umm, umm one of those IM type things for www.ourhypnospace.com  hooked up too so people could just IM each other through www.ourhypnospace.com   There’s a lot of stuff to go on, so hey, let’s, we’re running short on time, why don’t you just wrap this up for us and ah, that’ll be it for another week. 

Celeste:  Ok, well it was really fun meeting with you again Cal.  You know I’m in ah Dallas, Texas at Family First Hypnosis and Cal’s all the way in Tustin, California we get together like this periodically to bring  information and ah all kinds of Etc., to you because it’s Cal Banyan’s Hypnosis Etc., and we’ll see you next time.

Cal:  Hey Celeste give them your, your, ah website address and email. 

Celeste:    And the website is my website is www.familyfirsthypnosis.com I also have a blog on www.ourhypnospace.com what about you Cal give them some of your stuff?

Cal:  Oh, remember if you’re watching this ah, there’s all, usually some different kinds of resources right down there below the, ah, this picture so if you’re watching it on Google, or Blip T.V.,  or some other website, ah to get all the details that we talk about the links and resources go to www.calbanyan.com .

Of course we’ve got www.hypnosis.org and ah one of my biggest, oldest websites is www.hypnosiscenter.com and you can always email me with your input at www.calbanyan.com that’s banyan@hypnosiscenter.com, take it away Celeste. 

Celeste:  Ok everybody it was great being with you thanks for joining us and we’ll see you next time on Cal Banyan’s Hypnosis, Etc., oh, by the way got questions about Hypnosis, we got answers, go to www.askcal.ourhypnospace.com post your question there, we’ll do our best to put them on the show, thanks bye, bye.

Cal:  Bye for now.

This recording is the property of Cal Banyan and Cal Banyan’s, Banyan Publishing, Incorporated.  All rights reserved, for private use only, may not be duplicated without written permission.

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